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Fanfic summary meme

All fics at spiralunbound. Crack summaries rawk.

One, as a kind of sample:

People Who Live in Glass Houses
Digital gate: Hai thar!
Ryo: Stupid digital world; get off my lawn.
Daisuke: Stop throwing rocks!
Ryo: WHUT

Allegro
Ryo: Osamu, you're being quiet.
Osamu: That's 'cause I like you.
Ryo: Oh, cool, I like you too. So this news report I'm reading about your death is just a cruel practical joke, right?
Ryo: Right?

Andante
Ryo: My best friend's dead.
Ken: My brother's dead.
Osamu: PS: Ilu in Russian.
Taichi: Oh, crap, Diablomon!
Ryo: Wormmon, why are you so useless?

What Comes Next
Ryo: Being famous bites.
Juri: Everyone hates me.
Takato: I copyrighted my best friend.
Hirokazu: ALRIGHT, ROYALTIES!
Jen: Why are me and Takato's voice actresses actresses and why are people slashing me with Takato?

Hurricane Epsilon
Shuichon: Damnit, Ryo, I've liked you since I was seven!

Transocean Air
Jen: Takato, your bag's vibrating.
Takato: What the?
Kurumon: HAI THAR!
Takato: adspjghpiasfhgadoeghafnkladv

Digital Cowboy
Ryo: I am bitter and the predecessor of digital_dive!Ryo.
Cyberdramon: Lol, watch me abuse formatting!

Come Fly With Me (This Isn't Beautiful)
Ryo: Hmm, Takato seems familiar.
Jen: No, he seems sad.
Ryo: Cheer up, emo kid, have a kiss.
Takato: I still love Juri more than you.

When Sane People Are Asleep
Jen: Dear Ruki, Hong Kong bites and I have a million cousins. Btw ilu. Love Jen. PS: My subconscious is telling me I have the hots for Ryo.
Ruki: Dear Jen, Shinjuku bites and Ryo won't leave me alone. Merry christmas. Love Ruki. YES, I SAID LOVE.
Ryo: Ruki~♥

Tomorrow
Remiro: HAI THAR!
Ruki: Freaking stalker. Jen, pretend to be my boyfriend, I'll give you anything.
Jen: Even a kiss?
Ruki: NO! ...okay fine.
Jen: YUS

Fiberglass Slipper
Ryo: OMG JEN I'M SORRY I MADE YOU BREAK YOUR ARM ILU.
Jen: ...Mom won't let me see you alone.
Ryo: oh. Hey Ruki, wanna be my fake girlfriend so Jen's mom will let me see him?
Ruki: Sure~♥
Jen: I AM NOT TALKING TO EITHER OF YOU EVER AGAIN.
Takato: Let's go to Okinawa!
Kai: Sup, Jen? I have the hots for you.
Jen: ...I have a boyfriend.
Ryo: Who is very sorry.
Jaarin: And hot.
Jen: HANDS OFF, BITCH.

Background Noise
Ruki: You're late!
Ryo: I know, I missed the train because I'm so vain I think that song's about me!

A Blunt Reckoning
Jen: Ruki, come to the dinosaur.
Terriermon: He's not going to kill you, honest!
Ruki: Er, so why are we here?
Jen: Look, I forgive you, but HANDS OFF, BITCH.
Ruki: Okay, w/e.

An Easy Mistake
Ryo: Mmm, Sam.
Jen: WHUT
Ryo: o/` It's all coming back to me now! o/`
Jen: Oh. Okay. Let's have sex!
Ryo: Sure! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Omg, bad dreams about Osamu, DIGIPORT OPEN.
Ruki: I saved your sorry ass from a Tailmon, stfu and kiss me.
Ryo: Sure-- HEY, I HAVE A BOYFRIEND! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GO AWAY.
Cyberdramon: I can has Parasimon?
Ryo: Oh, crap.

Two Sets of Teeth
Ryo: THE DIGIGNOMES MADE ME DO IT.
Jen: So not impressed, Ryo.
Ryo: But...ilu?
Jen: Yeah, well, you've sure got a funny way of showing it.
Takato: I really shouldn't eavesdrop.